A story

This is the story xx told me yesterday. I think it was pretty interesting, so I am going to post it.

The suicide story:
A girl was going to commit suicide as she thought life is meaningless for her.
So she jumped down from the 10th storey.
When she was falling..
At the 9th storey, she saw a couple quarrelling.
At the 8th storey, she saw man waiting for his family to come back to his side.
At the 7th storey, she saw a father ill-treating his children.
At the 6th storey, she saw a drunkard hitting his wife.
And so on..
Each storey she passed by, depicts a different story.
At the 2nd storey, she regretted jumping, she regretted committing suicide.
But it was too late, she landed dead on the 1st floor.
Upon hearing the noise, the neighbor's came out of their house and took a look.
The neighbors were glad that they are not the one committing suicide.

What is the moral of the story?
Close your eyes when jumping? So that you will not see too much? Of course not, silly!
Each person has their own story of life. Killing doesn't help at all.
People will alway regret at the last minute but often it was too late.
The best way to resolve a problem is to communicate with people.
___________________________________________________________________

Today met alvin on the bus. We have a short talk. Was quite surprised to see him on the bus. Kind of happy. =) He smiles when he's talking. Haha. I like the way he smiles. I was late for the paper. When in when the paper started. Could have been able to do it if I study. If only..
Perhaps sunday going to church with parky.
Have a nice talk with him yesterday.
Guilty.
Sinner.
Need to confess my sin.
=(
Sorry those who I hurt.
I am really sorry.

If nothing is forever, then what is forever for?

I feel bad. Really bad.
Treating u like this is what i will never do.
But seeing u feeling so useless yet i can't do anything to cheer u up.
Am i more useless than u?
If not why am i feeling it that way.
I want to hug u and cry.
But all i can do is to sit at one corner and cry alone.
I thought u will be happy with such decision, but i am wrong again.
I hurt u more than anyone else could.
I feel inhuman.
I feel guilty.
How can i ever face u again?
Sorry alvin. I am really sorry.
I once said before, if u want me to be there for u, i will.
But u didn't..
U told me not to wait for u.
Why?
U think it's meaningless to make me stay?
While i will be happier with other guys?
Is this being kind or being cruel?
Cos I don't know.
Crying doesn't help.
25th.. how can i ever forget this date?
Sigh.
The ring, the roses, the key chain and the toy.
How could i ever hurt someone like u so deeply?
I am foolish.
I am a fool!

Kill me!

If tomorrow never comes

What will you ever do if there is no tomorrow?
I have been thinking about it.
I guess that I am tired.
Vin called me in the morning.
We talked for a long time. Never feel that close to him for such a long time.
He asked me about xx. Quite surprise that he read my blog, thought he never will.
Perhaps certain things I think too much that led to who I am today.
I am sorry. I never mean to let u know about it so late. It was my fault. I blame no one.

Forgive me, will you?
Hugs.
Best wishes.
=)

Stars are cold comfort if all u ever want is the warmth of the sun.

I don't know my feelings.
I guess I don't even know myself.
For that moment, I don't know what to do.
But I know that I like you.
I just can't feel for him.
It's my fault.
I shouldn't like anyone.
Yes.
I am silly.
How can I be so dumb?
Maybe I should go for some brain wash.
Ha!
It will be good.
Weeee!
I am sick.
I feel like crying yet there is no tear.
Am I numb?
Perhaps.
Memories.
Last longer than reality.

daonebeythsuedonfwrdioln.

The Excursion

Welcome to the Ngee Ann poly excursion.
It's an excursion without consent form.
=X
When to newton hawker center with xx. It was not as crowded as I expect it to be. The food there is soso standard. Mostly are BBQ foods, quite similiar to chomp chomp. Except that Newton got more tables and chairs. We order fried carrot cake, hokkien mee, lala and stingray. Xx forgot the name for carrot cake and all he said was "Uncle, black one." whahahaha. So funny. When we're ready to go to somewhere cooler, we thought that was the end of the hotness, sweatness. But.. Something silly happened. I bought a bottle of mineral water and there is this plastic covering the cap. So I tear off the plastic and looking for place to throw it. Just then I notice a table with cups and can-drink that has no people sitting. I threw the rubbish into the cup and hear an uncle saying "Oi.. Oi..". I turned back and looked. The uncle was shouting at me. I panicked and asked xx to run. So we ran to the overhead bridge. LOL. How stupid can I be. That was the funniest moment.
Then we went to look for some cars. haha. Antique and vintage cars. Oh myy.. I want I want! We walked from newton hawker to little india. Quite fun. We visited KK hospital, little india and lastly, my play ground. Fun and enjoyable day.

25 words or less to describle me, to make me feel that I am beautiful.


Pathetic obsession over linn. LOL!





The foods that we ordered. The "black one". See, really so black.



The pic we took after copying someone victory sign. hahaha! Silly.

Poets often use many words to say a simple thing
But it takes thought and time and rhyme to make a poet sings

With music and words,
I will be playing
For you I have written a song

To be sure that you'll know what
I'm saying
I'll translate as I go along

Fly me to the moon
And let me play among the stars
Let me see what spring is like
On jupiter and mars

In other words hold my hand
In other words darling kiss me

Fill my heart with song
And let me sing forever more
You are all I long for
All I worship and adore

In other words Pplease me true
In other words
I love you

The breeze of the night is cooling.
The feeling of sitting and slack is nice.
The holding make me feel confused.
I... Don't know what to do.
I can't make up my mind.
I am not ready for relationship.
I just want to rest. Stay happy and have fun.
Why can't it be simple?
I don't like complicated thing.
I never understand it.
Sigh.
I don't understand the meaning of like and love.
What exactly is it?
How I wish I am still a child.
Playground is the only way to make a child happy.
Ice cream doesn't make me happy anymore.
Am I growing up?
Sigh.
How can I love when I am confused.

Love, a complicated word.

V day

I went to school late! I am late by 1hour. It's a new record for me.
Then went to play CS with park they all. Have fun there. =) Thanks for the sun flower guys!
Went out with alvin. He bought me 3 pink roses. What does that mean? Happy to see flowers! =)
We have curry at bugis. Yum yum. Nice.
He said I shouldn't buy him expensive things anymore. But the wallet is really not expensive at all. Sigh. Buy him this, buy him that he doesn't appreciate. Whatever. bitcoenartebh.
I am tired.
I really feel sick of this kind of comment.
Good night.
Happy valentine's day.
Tomorrow will be better.
=)

The PM test today is difficult.
Linn is killed.
Comparision kills.
Died.
Depression.
Moody.
Sigh.

Roses

Have been folding roses since yesterday. It's tough.
Roses that are..
Red: means love, respect.
Light pink: Admiration, sympathy.
Deep pink: Gratitude, appreciation.
Single rose: Simplicity.
3 Red roses: I love you.
Etc..
Roses are often purchase for occassion e.g. valentine day.
Restuarants are often fully booked and rosed are selling at the price of $10 for 1 stalk.
What is so important about valentine's day that people are making a big deal out of it?
Valentine day is a day that lovers celebrate their love. Valentine's day can also be the day to confess the love for someone.
People are often excited about the day as they will anxious to find out who will present them with gifts and what is the gift. But it's not the gift alone that counts. It's the thought that went behind it, the time and effort made.
So what have u plan for your love one?
__________________________________________________________________
Alot of things can't be say.
Is it a long term or a short term?
Silly. Not me.
I think too much.
Tomorrow is a killer day! ROAR.
3 papers in a day. DIE. How am I going to cope with studies? =/

Regret are alway related with what ifs.

La-la-la

Zoo

The zoo trip we went today was fun! I'm quite excited about it. But the rain spoiled everything. Raining photo taking.
Animals hiding in their shether. Discover a lot of things about animals. I like raccoon and graffie. whahahahaha!
My brother got back his result. Better than mine. What a clever brother I have? Confident and smart? =.= i thought he was bullshit-ing about how well he can score but now, I got to admit that he's smart IF he works hard. Told alvin about it. Think he was happy too, didn't disappointed him after all his teaching. =) Thank you.
Was feeling quite moody. Somehow I don't feel like talking. Because of the weather? Must be. Certain thing I don't know how I should react.
Laugh? Smile?
Cry? Tears?
Stone? Blur?
Too many thing to think about. =/

Unwell.

Copycat house! messy messy. LOL! I become a cat too. meow~

I wish I wasn't

I'm home alone again.
And you're out, hanging with your friends.
So you say, but I know it's not quite that way.
It's getting pretty late and you haven't checked on me all day.
When i called, you didn't answer.
Now I'm feeling like you're ignoring me.

I wish that you were home.
Holding me, tight in your arms.
And I wish, I could go back
To the day before we met and skip my regret.

I wish I wasn't in love you.
So you couldn't hurt me.
It just ain't fair the way you treat me.
No, you don't deserve me.
Wasted my time thinking about you and you ain't never gone change.
I wish I wasn't in love with you.
So I wouldn't feel this way.
_________________________________________________
Keep on listening to this song.
It's a nice song.
Bright cheery day.
But I am down with flu.
BOo!
Theory is getting more and more tough.
I am confused with the the rules and position of notes.
I will spare a thought for you from now on.
No matter how disappointed it will be.
Yaa.
Life should be enjoyable.
Life can be easy yet seem difficult.
Life can be valuable but difficult to cherish.
Life can be bright!
lalala~

I. Miss. You.
=)

+Minds Game+

Minds game huh?
I am not a good guesser.
I am too lazy to guess.
Promises were made and forgotten.
Time passed fast, soon everyone will forget what really happened.
Let time proves everything..
My mum woke me up early in the morning.
Shouting and nagging at me.
I repelled.
I told her I am going to quit.
I hurt her.
And now she's not talking to me.
I just feel like slacking at times.
Just feel someone will be here to advise me, telling me why I shouldn't do this and that.
I looked around.
I am the only in my room.
Bed is my only comfort.
I just feel like sleep and sleep.
Run away.
I want to explore the world.
I want to see how people survive in different surrounding.
I want to learn how to speak up.
I want to learn how to be strong.
I just want..

I am just too weak.

+Sweetie+

Return home late as usual.
Talked to alvin on the phone. Was quite happy at first. Until he mentions that he's going for his class chalet. Then I was waiting for him to invite me? But he didn't. So.. I think about it again. Does he really need me? Why am I always feeling jealous? Why am I always feeling hurt? Maybe we both need to think. Really think hard. I can't even communicate well with him, how is he going to communicate with me. But when he really need me to be there, I will be there for him. =)
I am sorry to let you down, I love you anyway.
Life is full of ups and downs.
But it can be memorable at times.
That's why we need to learn to cherish things.
As usual, I am late again.
Mao is offline! ROAR.
Where you want to eat tomorrow?!
NUUUUuuuuuu!~

I am need hugging.
Can someone hug me please?